Day 32: God's Got This

Today is bittersweet. It is the last day I have to work the closing shift. I am glad to be done with it but at the same time, I am not all that excited about going back to mornings. It is just another schedule change. I must begin working with my boss again. I am sure it will be fine because I put the situation into Gods hands.

I went to the gym today and weighed myself on the professional scale. I have finally broke 200lbs! I am 199. That gave me a boost of energy so I had a great workout today. I am loving the way I feel and the fact that I sleep well. I am just enjoying this experience. Today as I was walking out the door to go to the gym, my buddy stopped me and asked how I was doing. I could tell by his tone that this wasn't just a question you ask in passing. He was truly asking how I was. I just began to pour out this journey to him and told him how I am beginning to feel. Besides all the positive things, I began to pour out my struggles. I realized during this conversation that I was beginning to bury those struggles and not sharing them was hurting me.

He continued to listen and as he encouraged me and listened I kept thinking about how I could encourage him back. I was about to get in my car after sharing a bit with each other and he stopped me. He said, "I see that you are about to go to the gym but I want to pray with you first."

I feel so blessed to have people that are willing to pray for me and care about me. I don't understand why God cares about me so much to answer my prayers. This morning I prayed that God would show me what to do and he sent this friend at just the right time to pick me back up.

So when I got back home I went for a run. At the end of the run I asked God to speak to me. He told me once again, "Josh, I've got this. I will be with you." I still don't want to know why God cares for me so much but I know that He has got my life in my hands. I am still in this desert and I am still wondering aimlessly but I am no longer doing it alone. God's got this.

So for Day 32, I accomplished the following:

No Drinking
No Smoking
P90x Diet and exercise
No Lying
No Dates

Changes:

God is melting my selfishness away. I am learning that I cannot survive not even one day without His guidance. I have a connection that I have never had before. I know that there is no obstacle to great for me to overcome and I know God is with me. When I encounter struggles I look at them differently. "This too shall pass." Learn and grow.

I want so much to be the person I was made to be, and I hope to find who that is on this journey. I still have so much work to do and will always be working on myself, but now I know that I am making true progress in discovering who God intended Josh to be.

As I am writing this, I am overcome by the Spirit of God and feel empowered. Tears are streaming down my face because I have accepted Gods'  Amazing Grace.