Day 4: Learning to play the Background

Day 4 was a huge success. Not in that I did any exercise or felt good about my reading. In fact, I didn't work out. I was still sick and felt terrible all day. But it was a success in the fact that I felt that if I could push through this little hiccup of being sick, then I could push through anything.


I am still reading Exodus. I find it amazing that even though the Israelite's saw God in a pillar of cloud and fire, saw Him send manna every day, saw Him part the Red Sea, and saw Him bring water from a rock they still built a golden calf. It blows my mind that they had the evidence right in front of their faces but still had the nerve to turn their backs on Him. It goes as far as to say that God was going to kill them all and Moses had to talk Him down. That is amazing to me. A God that is all powerful and can wipe us out with a single word can still change his mind because of the advice of a human. That is evidence of a God that truly believes in a relationship. If they can see Him everyday and still not believe then how much more faith does it take to believe in a God that isn't always visible?

So for day 4 I accomplished the following:

No drinking
No smoking
Selected Reading
No lying

Changes:

I have been noticing some changes. I am extremely sore still but I am noticing a much larger drive in motivation. I have been sick and felt terrible all day but I still wanted to work out and read. I didn't work out because I was told that I needed to take it easy or else I would prolong the sickness.

I am hoping for much bigger changes as I go along. I still think about my situation and how bad it is but then I tell myself that I am here for a reason. I am here for this exact reason actually. To recover and find God. There really isn't a better reason. I think that is why I haven't been getting any call backs from the jobs I have been applying to. I think God wants me here for some reason. But as long as I am trusting in Him then I don't have to worry about what that reason is. I am learning to play the background.